Week 36 (Sept 3 – Sept 9)

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At the start of this week, I turned 25! In leu of writing a weekly blog post, I wrote about my thoughts on turning 25.

First week in this new age was fun and full of friendship – notably, Jessi finally moved in! I say finally – I’ve only lived here a week. Ha. It’s been so nice to live with someone else again. Living alone came naturally to me – I gravitate towards solitude, towards isolating myself and/or only seeing people on occasion. I don’t think there’s anything tremendously wrong with this, and honestly, I liked it a lot of the time.

That said, I like knowing someone is nearby, even if we’re not always interacting. There is living, breathing, friendly life near me. Someone to tell about my day, someone I can ask about theirs.

I think it’s good for me to live with other people. 4 was a lot, granted, but I think it’s good for me to not isolate myself too much more than I am naturally inlined to.

In other news –

I had a bit of a ~ creative breakthrough ~ this week, to be very dramatic about it. I’ve had a few different ideas ruminating in my mind for a wildly long time – nothing fleshed out, but just ideas I’ve had for years probably. Out of nowhere, while driving to work one day, I actually had a narrative idea pop into my head – something that could give shape and drive to these ideas that had before felt so ambiguous – WHAT A WILD TIME.

The goal is to ride this breaking wave and actually flesh out the idea more. I’m hopeful right now – I’ve been dying for something to fill me with life and make me excited. I feel that with this, and I just want to cling to it as much as possible, even if it’s fleeting.

Also, the ever important reminder: my art doesn’t need to safe anyone but myself.

Write if it makes me happy, write even if no one else gets it, write if the responses I’m looking for don’t happen. I’m allowed to create without an audience and feel fulfilled by that.

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Switching gears again, I actually ran 7 miles this week! Also, I was finally able to redownload the Big Little Lies audiobook (weeks ago someone else had finally snatched after I ran out of renews). I want to try to finish it in the next 20 days – incidentally, the amount of time I have left on this current renewal. I’ve really enjoyed listening to this while I run though. It’s nice having already watched the TV show. I know what happens, if I lose focus for a moment, I’m not going to miss anything too crazy big that I don’t already know. That said – the book offers a lot of additional narrative, which has kept me intrigued even if it’s the same story I’ve already seen on the screen.

Song of the Week: Coins, by Local Natives

This song comes up a lot on my Spotify over the last few months and I didn’t really listen to the lyrics until earlier this week. It began to play the other day, and the first line just HIT me – “Time stands still and then one day it’s gone / Where did it go? / Where did I go?” It completely summed up what I’ve been feeling the past few weeks – this fear that life is just soaring by me and I’m not catching it.

I proceeded to listen to the song approximately 5 million more times, thus fulfilling my natural obsessive tendencies. I suppose some things never change.

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This has been a post!

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